~me~

eryn...u NEED to be strong!!!

2010-04-21T08:45:00.002+08:00

yesterday, when i heard the news.

i cried.

babah told me that mum's operation is on 29th of April 2010.

but when babah told me that mum have to go for chemo after the operation.

my heart is so devastated.

chemo is to harsh for her.

she will lose her hair.

she will be thin and thinner.

even my fingers shivering to type all those words.

i called babah.

'do we have 2nd option bah?do mama have to go for chemo?'

babah answered,'doctor told me that mum HAVE to go for chemo.'

'but chemo is to harsh for her.it's to harsh,'i started to cry.

but after a while of thinking, if that is the best for mum.

so i have to see her going through with chemo.

so that's why i HAVE to be strong.

me being strong because of u,mum.

i love u and i will stand still beside u like u always do.

p/s:i like this picture of her.very stylo ok!!haha...

my birthday present from mum

2010-04-12T11:11:00.002+08:00

hahaha...tq mum...

love u soo much...

tau2 je jam lame dh rosak...

mum...actually i don't need the watch...

i need your prayers...

pray for me ok mum...

dipermudahkan rezeki...

dijodohkan dgn org yg baik and beriman...

always be a good daughter to you...

always be there for you...

i love you so much...

iza's birthday celebration...

2010-04-12T10:58:00.004+08:00

birthday girl...requesting want to eat at Sushi King...

hahaha suke kamu kan!!

we have to go for jogging...sbb byk mkn udang...hahaha

happy birthday girl...my Allah grant u health n wealth...

love u soo much...

this one...hahaha gmbr xready...

iza sgt jahat...

dengki angah sgt comel...

this one...hahaha

this one i don't know what happen to me...

tgh tgk org tu buat sushi kot...

i think so...

ha!!!i remember...

tgh tgk jam...

sbb nk pegi shopping kan after that...i like...

this one...see my 'pucat' face...

mm no!!focus on my eyes...

swallow eyes...i was crying...

mm...

p/s : iza...i hope u like your present...

pls remember that...i only have u sayang...

i willing to come to melake driving alone...

just to celebrate your birthday...suke sgt ur kursus cancelled...

hahaha love u soo much...more than everything babe...

update blog...

2010-03-23T08:03:00.001+08:00

it's really been a while...
since i'm having 2 blogs...
so i try my best to keep both blogs..
i know it's not easy...
but i'm trying my best...
chow~~~

sayang...i miss you so much...

2010-02-24T10:32:00.002+08:00

i know lately it's been really busy for both of us.
i neglected you.
you neglected me.

so how about we make up?
you know like those old time.
tangkap gambar.
walking around the lake.
having lunch together.

really miss that moments.
anyway in case you stop by at my blog.
lagu kt bawah tu.
for you sayang.
really love you damn much.
rindu sgt2.

karena aku cinta kau...for you

2010-02-24T10:24:00.000+08:00

Jika ada yang bilang ku lupa kau
Jangan kau dengar
Jika ada yang bilang ku tak setia
Jangan kau dengar

Banyak cinta yang datang mendekat
Ku menolak
Semua itu karena ku cinta kau

Jika ada yang bilang ku tak baik
Jangan kau dengar
Jika ada yang bilang ku berubah
Jangan kau dengar

Banyak cinta yang datang mendekat
Ku menolak
Semua itu karena ku cinta kau
Kau

Reff:
Saat kau ingat aku ku ingat kau
Saat kau rindu aku juga rasa
Ku tahu kau slalu ingin denganku
Ku lakukan yang terbaik yang bisa ku lakukan
Tuhan yang tahu ku cinta kau

Jika kau tak percaya pada ku
Sakitnya aku
Jika kau lebih dengar mereka
Sedih hatiku
Banyak cinta yang datang mendekat
Ku menolak
Semua itu karena ku cinta kau
Kau

Back to Reff:

Saat kau ingat aku ku ingat kau
Saat kau rindu aku juga rasa
Ku tahu kau slalu ingin denganku
Kau tahu ku juga ingin denganmu
Ku tahu kau slalu ingin denganku
Ku lakukan yang terbaik yang bisa ku lakukan
Tuhan yang tahu ku cinta kau

my bad attitude and habit...

2010-02-18T09:06:00.003+08:00

i realize something that this year i'm going to be 26 years old...
show me the time really fly...
then i try to rememberise what have i done for the last 26 years...
all the good and bad things...
while doing that i keep listing my bad attitudes and habits...
hahaha...so immature me...

1) i still kept my 'bantal busuk' for 15 years.and mum will never give up trying to throw it away.
2) until now my parents is my alarm clock.wake me up everyday especially on working day.haha tq mum n dad.
3) i still fight with my sister over small things.example,if she bought a different ice-cream for me.i will ask her to buy the same thing for me like hers.so immature ok!!
4) if i being scold by mum...i'll cry.
5) still 'main rambut' before sleep.mama keep 'pukul' my hand to make me stop doing that.but it's a failure mum.i still doing that.weee~~~
6) i always want to be in the centre of attention.i need that to be alive.hahaha.
7) easy to cry over a small thing.mcm kawan kawin xjemput kan!!!
8) i like to read comics.especially romance comics.

so that's all my listing...
i hope that i can change from time to time...
but if i change it won't be the same eryn right!

new year outdoor activity...

2010-01-03T18:43:00.020+08:00

2nd january 2010.new year.new hope.new strength.

so yesterday,we the whole family decided to celebrate our new year outside of KL.
so we choose to celebrate at Janda Baik, Pahang.
really nice place.
we all satisfied walaupun a bit tired (a bit ke?)
the people at Janda Baik is very kind & helpful.
they are so helpful.
show us the best place until reach the door step.

that adik : kt sini la tmpt berkelah tu.(she pointed the place from inside the car)
me : terima kasih adik (me hulur my hand to shake hand with her.actually i hide 2 RM10 note on my palm)
that adik : ehh akak,ape ni?
me : untuk makan2 skit.terima kasih byk2 eyh adik.(i just smile n wave at them)
that adik still with her cuak face leave the place.

so there are some pictures for your eyes.enjoy...

me trying mum's hat...

me trying to get there.nearer to YOU...

smile...

eating time...

haha...nasib xjatuh

besar punye!!!

us...

us...

the whole family...sesat sorg eyh!!

me & YOU...

the photographer(org kuat)haha...tq so much to you...

last day of the year...

2009-12-31T10:07:00.006+08:00

ermm i'm not really going to say anything...
so just want u to enjoy this song...
from Charice...Note to God...

If I wrote a note to God
I would speak what's in my soul
I'd ask for all the hate to be swept away
For love to overflow

If I wrote a note to God
I'd pour my heart out on each page
I'd ask for war to end
and for peace to mend this world

I'd say
I'd say
I'd say

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love, cause love is overdue
And it seems like so much is going wrong
On this road we're on

If I wrote a note to God
I'd say please help us find a way
End all the bitterness, put some tenderness
in our hearts

I'd say
I'd say
I'd say

Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love, cause love is overdue
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help from you

Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is going wrong
On this road we're on

No
No

We can't do it on our own

So
So

(Give us the strength to make it through
Help us find love, cause love is overdue)
And it looks like we haven't got a clue
Need some help

Grant us the faith to carry on
Give us hope when it seems all hope is gone
Cause it seems like so much is going wrong
On this road we're on

No
No
(No) We can't do it on our own

(So)
So

If I wrote a note to God

miley cyrus...

2009-11-26T08:42:00.004+08:00

this video almost make me cry...

changing tyre...

2009-11-20T08:47:00.003+08:00

pg ni sblm pegi keje,mmg niat nk stop by at the petrol station.
nk isi angin tayar.
but when i reach there...jeng jeng jeng!!!
ade paku kt tayar.
so i called my life saver(babah).

"bah,tayar pancit.angah kt petronas bukit antarabangsa ni."
"ok...wait there"

about 15 mins later, babah came with along.
they change the tyre with the spare tyre.

"bah...mcm takut je.kenape tayar tu kecil sgt?"
"ishhh ape plak takut.blh pegi balik singapore tau pkai tayar ni"
hahahaha along and me laughing.
i don't know why but it convincing me.

so proud to say that's my dad.
the future dr mohd hisham hashim.

and i notice something.
even i'm old enough to think wisely.
but when it comes to my dad.
if he say he will give me the whole world to me.
i believe him.
and i won't blame him if he can't give me that.

happy 3rd anniversary to me...

2009-11-13T08:22:00.003+08:00

happy 3rd anniversary eryn~~~

my anniversary...
and mine alone...

i know that things a bit messy for you at these moment...
but don't you think...
i deserve something special from you?
honestly, i really need that...
to make sure that i'm not losing you...

i understand what you have gone through lately...
but can you at least understand my feelings?
appreciate me like i appreciate you...
appreciate me for being patience...
like i appreciate you for being patience with me...
do i?

sacrifice a little of your works for me...
like i done to you last tuesday...
can you?
sacrifice your weekends to watch movies with me...
can you?
sacrifice your night meetings just to have dinner with me...
can you?

don't i deserve all of these from you...
after 3 years we've been together?
all the ups and downs...
so what do you think?

anyway...thank you sayang...
for being there for these 3 years...
happy 3rd anniversary...
may our relationship last forever...
i love you...

Our Love Still Grows
Our anniversary means a lot,
Much more than any another day;
I celebrate my love for you,
And cherish you in every way.
Through passing time, our love still grows,
A caring relationship to explore;
Our life together gets better and better,
And I keep on loving you more and more.
By Karl Fuchs

say goodbye (only a part of it)

2009-11-02T11:18:00.000+08:00

i love you,katharine mcphee.

stranded

2009-10-27T08:16:00.001+08:00

one of my favourite song in one of my favourite movie.
if u can recall 'You Drive Me Crazy' movie.
cast by Melissa Joan Hart n Adrian Grenier.

grooming

2009-10-26T09:36:00.005+08:00

last week,i told my boyfriend that he needs to groom a little bit.
since that he is changing his career.
so he will become busier.
and will be lesser time spent with me.
and me.
will spent most of my time doing....???
which until now i can't conclude anything.

so i gave him a suggestion to change his dressing.
AND his hair style.
this is my suggestion...
hair style like...jeng jeng jeng

ZAC EFRON

so last saturday,he told me that he is going to have his hair cut.
so i was..."i thought you agreed with my suggestion."
"yes,i am.i print the picture and show to 'amoi'(the chinese girl that cut his hair)"
"oo ok.so mms me your picture ok?"
silent~~~
then 3 mins after i received a msg.
so jeng jeng jeng...

"tapi 'amoi' to kate kene simpan rambut dpn"
which i totally 100% agreed.
:)

2009-10-26T09:31:00.002+08:00

omg :'(..
i wish u guys were here with me..
apart from u guys really make me feel bad..
i juz felt like yesterday we gathered n laughed out loud together..
if i could have enuf money to bring u guys along,surely im d happiest person ever :)
i cant wait to c u in march,angah..
perhaps adi will follow you as well..
he is so excited to come over here~! :))
but for time being,take gud care of everyone esp bah n ma (really worried with their health condition)..
hurm n adi as well,cuz he is really miserable ryt now even if he tried to hide from u guys..
ok angah,send my regards to all..
luv u all muahhhh!

it's really been a while since i check my blog.
this is what wani commented in one of my post.
really make me sad.
especially about adi.
he seems ok to us.
but who knows deep inside his heart what he felt.
wani...
i can't promise you to make him happy or whatever.
but i promise you i'll try my best.

i believe to anything...

2009-10-12T13:05:00.001+08:00

i'm easily believe in people.
so now i'm sickening.
believe to things that can never happen.

wani's departure...

2009-10-05T09:55:00.004+08:00

yesterday was the day that mum hate the most...
4th October 2009...
wani have to go back to Surrey...
her classes start on 6th October 2009...

ermm adi...
be strong ok...
and you also wani...
mum and babah...
everyone la...

so p/s to you wani...
i might going there on March...
so be ready...
hahahaha....

wani's farewell

2009-10-05T09:42:00.002+08:00

last saturday...
i and apei went to Low Yat and Pudu Plaza...
accompany him to buy GPS and his camera lense...
so we when to Low Yat first to but the GPS...
since that i don't know how to get to the Pudu Plaza...
after that, we when to Pudu Plaza looking for his lense...

so after that, we when home(my house)...
they all are waiting for me and apei...
so that we can convoi to Tarbush for wani's farewell...

mum was so happy...
because everyone was there...
except for kak erna (along's gf)...
she is still at Germany...
completing her master...
we all hoping that she can be there...

so...7 of us...
babah
mama
along
me
apei
wani
adi (wani's bf)
iza
pejol (iza's bf)

and wani seem happy...
*the pictures i will attach tomorrow*

plan~~~

2009-09-15T08:55:00.002+08:00

soal hati.
siapa yang tau?
bile pikir balik.
pikir sume bende yg jadi.
mmg sume org pn xkan tau.
why it's happen?
the pros and cons.
sometimes we plan.
but always remember that Allah plan is the great.
He done it for the goods of us.
when you were down, because things doesn't goes with your plan.
just think that way.
Allah plan is the great.

patience~~~

2009-09-08T08:58:00.002+08:00

8:41 a.m.
i'm late.
why?
this is my story.

usually NKVE highway always have a bump-to-bump traffic jam.
so i don't mind since that all the car is still moving.
but a bit slower lah.

so today.there is a car.
WEF4422.(i still can remember the plat number)
overtake me at the speed lane.(lorong paling kanan)
so i don't mind since that i was thinking maybe he is late.
ok...the problem start here.
he overtake me.
AND HE DRIVE SLOWER THAN ME.
driving with no hand.
because both of his hand busy checking his hair.
busy checking his face.
busy trying to look handsome before reaching his office.
he is not driving in a straight line.
and he is letting a big gap.
all the car and all the lorry overtake him.

MY GODNESS...only HIM know how angry i am.
i know supposedly we must be extra patience.
because we are in the fasting month.
but i'm so mad.
because i know that i will be late to work.
then while driving.
i heard mama's voice.
"sayang...you have your dad's patience."
how i wish that is true ma.
maybe at some occasion.
but making me late to work.
it's totally pissed me off.

SMIDEC

2009-08-14T09:00:00.004+08:00

*taken from internet not my boss's phone*

last 2 days and yesterday me n my boss went to SMIDEC.
Haji asked me to get every information about business grant.
so i went.
bring along encik amir.
OR encik amir went.
bring along me.
whichever la!!!
so we went and i give them...
jeng jeng jeng...
5 stars for the 'layanan' and all the information they gave.
can't wait to go there for 3rd time.
if Haji want the grants.
supposely there are 2 pictures i captured.
but the pictures saved in my boss's phone.

"encik amir pinjam phone.nak tangkap gambar,"me asking permission from him.
"amikla,"he asnwered.
"thank you boss,"me saying.
he just smile.

you know why i captured the picture of the building?

"angah,building ape tu?,"wani asked.
"yang mane?,"me asking back.
"yang ade lubang kat tengah building tu,"she pointed the MATRADE buiding.
"xtaula sayang.nnti angah siasat,"me answered.
"hahahaha.baik cakap xtau je."

TQ guys!!!

2009-08-13T11:54:00.002+08:00

last week is the most tense week in my whole life.
too many things happened.
too many things that i can't stop thinking about.
then they're becoming a negative karma in my life.
TQ guys!!!
really really really really really really really really really really
appreciate it!!!

1.babah

"nape xabis makan?,"babah asking.
i'm giving him a sour smile.
"xpela.try abiskan all the extra ingredients tu eyh."
i'm showing him a-i'm-not-feeling-like-eating-smile.
then babah looking at mama.
with THAT look.
THAT who-mess-with-my girl-u'll-screwed-look.

2.mama

"i need to go for a vacation.can i?alone?,"me asking.
mum think harder.
"if that will make you happy sayang,"mama answered.
i know that is the tough decision that ever made by mum.
but she knows i really need her support.

3.wani & adi

"ala angah,someone better will come along.don't worry,"wani saying.
"i decided to be alone,"me saying.
"ishh angah,jangan cakap mcmtu la.jangan risau,"adi saying.
i just smile.

4.my boss(encik amir)

"call him.talk to him.if ok why not start it all over again,"him saying.
"start all over again!!!no!!!that is most impossible things will happen,"me saying.
"i know.deep inside your heart,u still love him,"him saying.
i'm shocked.how does he knows?
"encik amir,if i'm the one who really wanted to start all over again.but not him?so?,"me saying.
him silent.
"jomla kite pegi makan!!,"him changing topic.
"jom!!!,"me saying with a smile.

5.aishah(BFF)

"apa masalah die kakak?,"aishah asking.
"kalo la aku tau kakak,"me saying.
"so mcmane skrg?,"she asking.
"mcmtu la.xnak try lagi,"me answered.
"seriously?,"aishah asking.
"100% sure.aku xnak jadi bodoh,"me saying.
"ok.bagusla tu.ape2 nnti msgla aku eyh,"aishah saying.
"ok!!,"me saying back.

6.officemates.

tq guys.terlalu byk nasihat was given to me.
i really appreciate it.
terima kasih.

how i wish i can give the world to you guys.
as a rewards for giving me strength.
so that i can touch the sky again.
see!!!
i never needed you to be strong

to YOU...hush hush

2009-08-09T10:40:00.007+08:00

*i prefer this version than the remix one*

i never needed you to be strong
i never needed you for pointin' out my wrongs
i never needed pain
i never needed strain
my love for you was strong enough you should've known
i never needed you for judgement
i never needed you to question what i spent
i never asked for help
i take care of myself
i don't know why you think you got a hold on me
and it's a little in the conversations
there isn't anything that you can say
and my eyes hurt
hands shiver
so look at me and listen to me because

i don't want to stay another minute
i don't want you to say a single word
hush hush hush hush
there is no other way i get the final say
because
i don't want to do this any longer
i don't want you
there's nothing left to say
hush hush hush hush
i've already spoken
our love is broken, baby hush hush

i never needed your corrections
on everything from how i act to what i say
i never needed words
i never needed hurt
i never needed you to be there everyday
i'm sorry for the way i let go
of everything i wanted when you came along
but i am never beaten, broken, not defeated
i know next to you is not where i belong
and it's a little late for explanations
there isn't anything that you can do
and my eyes hurt, hands shiver,
so you will listen when i say baby

i don't want to stay another minute
i don't want you to say a single word
hush hush hush hush
there is no other way i get the final say
because
i don't want to do this any longer
i don't want you
there's nothing left to say
hush hush hush hush
i've already spoken
our love is broken, baby hush hush

no more words
no more lies
no more crying
no more pain
no more hurt
no more tryin'
because

i don't want to stay another minute
i don't want you to say a single word
hush hush hush hush
there is no other way i get the final say
because
i don't want to do this any longer
i don't want you
there's nothing left to say
hush hush hush hush
i've already spoken
our love is broken, baby hush hush

hush hush hush hush
i've already spoken
our love is broken baby

'i gave up on him'

2009-08-05T08:59:00.005+08:00

i can't remember when.
"eryn,i need your shoulder."
"why?what happen?"
'my fren' show me the sms

a*** mmg syg.tp bkn la syg yg nk smpai kawin.terpulang la klau xnk kwn lgsg mcm biase.xtau a*** nk ckp mcm mane.

then, what for he's being fren with you.
untuk mempermainkan perasaan.
he is in the safe zone.
he'll make sure that you will do the 'mistake'.
and the 'mistake' will not done by him.
3 years you had wasted your life.
you can find someone better along the time.
you can find someone that can love you more than he is.
you have done everything for him.
most everything!!!
so if i were u...i gave up on him!!
i really gave up on him.

emotionally down

2009-08-04T09:54:00.002+08:00

yesterday night,while i'm watching tv with adi and wani.
wani switch on her laptop.
put on play the 'window media player'
the 1st song was play is...

entah masih kah ada cinta dihatiku untuk mu
entah kapan kah ku dapat membuka hati ini, untuk mu..o...

song sang by afgan.
really shoot me directly to the heart.
makes my cry.
'angah,angah nangis eyh?'
me silent.
'it's not at the end of the world angah.just think about the bright side'.
i have to be strong to be me again.

broken

2009-07-28T08:31:00.002+08:00

I wanted you to know that
I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away...
I keep your photograph and
I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

You gone away, you don't feel me here anymore

The worst is over now
And we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn
And no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause I’m broken when I'm open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

Cause I’m broken when I'm open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away...

Cause I’m Broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone...

You gone away, you don’t feel me here anymore

cherish the love.

2009-07-15T09:09:00.003+08:00

ermm...last night we went for outing together.
not dating, but surveying for camera lense.
so me decided to go to Low Yat.
it's really been so long since we 'lepak' together until late at night.
last 3 years,that is one of our favourite activities.
'lepak' until 5am in the morning.
watching midnight movies.
go to beaches.
having teh tarik.
but since you and i started working.
automatically everything stop!!
but i really cherish last night.
sometimes is good for you and me 'lepak'.
just two of us.
at the middle of the night.
walking without thinking of any problems that hunting us.
kan!!!
miss the moments.

demi cinta by kerispatih

2009-07-13T08:47:00.002+08:00

maaf ku telah menyakitimu
ku telah kecewakanmu
bahkan ku sia-siakan hidupku
dan ku bawa kau seperti diriku

walau hati ini trus menangis
menahan kesakitan ini
tapi kulakukan semua demi cinta

akhirnya juga harus kurelakan
kehilangan cinta sejatiku
segalanya telah kuberikan
juga semua kekuranganku

jika memang ini yang terbaik
untuk diriku dan dirinya
kan kuterima semua demi cinta

jujur aku tak kuasa
saat terakhir ku genggam tanganmu
namun yang pasti terjadi
kita mungkin tak bersama lagi

bila nanti esok hari
ku temukan dirimu bahagia
ijinkan aku titipkan
kisah cinta kita selamanya

jujur aku tak kuasa
saat terakhir ku genggam tanganmu
namun yang pasti terjadi
kita mungkin tak bersama lagi

bila nanti esok hari
ku temukan dirimu bahagia
ijinkan aku titipkan
kisah cinta kita selamanya

demi cinta

long-lost friends

2009-07-09T08:55:00.003+08:00

on my way to work,i saw a red kelisa.
the plat number is so-familiar.
so i decided to overtake the car to see whose the driver.
it's abg rudy n kak awien on his side.
my Godness, it's really been a while since i met them.
i wave at them hoping that they recognize me.
they wave back and it's really a-make-me-smile wave.
but i have to drive a BIT faster because i'm screwed.
i'm going to be late to work.
so along the way, aishah, kak ekin, kema, faliq, yoko, apei...
everyone suddenly appears.
how are they doing?
are they going great?
we have been through with so many ups and downs.
how i realize that they all have become my long-lost friends!!

crumpling head

2009-07-08T08:56:00.003+08:00

this month..is the most-patience-month..
too many things happenned..
too many things challenge my patience..
as a daughter..
as a sister..
especially as a girlfriend..
please have faith in me..
as i have my faith on you..
i will..
and i always..

You said move on
Where do I go
I guess second best
Is all I will know

Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes

He kissed my lips
I taste your mouth
He pulled me in
I was disgusted with myself

bad news

2009-07-03T14:40:00.002+08:00

when i heard the news from you.
i don't think i can handle it.
suddenly the whole world fall on my shoulder.
what have i done to you for the past 25 years?
did i treat you well?
i was crying.
can i fulfill all your wishes?
am i strong enough to fulfill all your wishes?
am i a good daughter?
i was crying.
think back what you have done to me.
to us.
it's really-obviously impossible to pay back.
i was crying.

i saw that!!!

2009-07-03T14:39:00.000+08:00

i saw mum kissing you.
on your both cheeks.
you're blushing.
trying to 'elak'.
hahahaha.

congrats...

2009-06-30T09:38:00.003+08:00

to both of you...congrats!!!

first to apei and second to adi.
congrats and good luck.
hope two of you can get use with the new environment.
with new friends.
our prayers will always be with you.
adi...take care.
don't worry about wani.
we might come and visit you there.
when the time that wani really need to see you.
apei...you are really making your way huh!!
hope you find what you want(especially you interested in)
nnti 1st salary don't forget me.(hahahaha kidding!!)
so...congrats to both of you.

revenge of the fallen

2009-06-29T11:17:00.003+08:00

OMG you should watch this movie.i can't bearly breath for the 3 and the half hour.sayang next week kite tgk eyh.me and you.

C.I.C.A.K

2009-06-29T10:28:00.006+08:00

this is one of itam's favourite.
she just can sit there.
and 'meow'ing the magic spell and the thing will fall down.
that is the greatest moment that she will cherish.
until she'll get other cicak other time.

so yesterday,i'm sending him to his red car(i miss that car more that i miss you).
it's about 10pm and it's getting late.
after spending one whole day with me.
perfectly 1 whole 24 hours.
i saw cicak on his windscreen.
so i catch the cicak and wanted to give to itam

'jangan datang dekat',he's saying
'nape?',me asking
'eeee geli la.kotor',he's saying
'tapi eryn nk bagi kt itam',me saying
'ha pegi bagi itam.apei tggu kt sini',he's saying with a big smile
'tggu tau.tggu tau.tggu tau',me saying repeatly until i'm in my house.

in my house

'see what angah got for itam.hahaha',evil laugh
'eeeeeeeeee...',mum,wani,iza scream
'ha nah iza tangkap!!',i just gimik wanted to throw cicak at her
'angah bodoh!!',she's running upstairs leaving us
'YOU...YOU DARE TO THROW AT ME?',mum asking
me smile sweetly but evil
'eeeeeeeeeeeee go away!!',mum screaming
'angah bongok!!',wani saying
then i wanted to give to adi.he seems xtakut cicak
'angah...eeeeeeee',he's screaming and he IS standing on our couch

dear my love one...
to mum who don't want to kiss me cause i'm holding cicak,
to my sayang apei,
to wani montel,
to wani's boyfriend adi crazy driver,
to iza gemuk,
you're a zillion times bigger that cicak
itu pn nk takut.hahahahahaha.LOL.

evil me...???

2009-06-23T08:56:00.003+08:00

eryn..
i nak mtk maaf btol2 dgn u...
i byk bwat salah dgn u..
i pakse u bwat benda yg u x suke..
i byk sakitkan hati u..
i berperangai x senonoh dgn u..
n thousands other things that i am so ashamed to mention..
i ask for your forgiveness..
i takut kalau i mati tetiba..
i x sempat nak mtk maaf dgn u..

should i forgive him?am i too bad for not forgiven him?
have he think about how i felt all these years?
i gave too much chances.no more chances for you.
you have to learn the hard way.sorry.

happy father's day

2009-06-22T09:03:00.002+08:00

last two day,we were not at home.on saturday,we went shopping at jusco wangsa maju.bought babah his present.we bought polo shirt,polo shoe,polo wallet,padini shirt and last but not least alain delon pants.babah was very happy.full set of his work attire.

on sunday,we bought along's present.he still unmarried.but he always act like a father to his sisters.taking care of us when babah went outstation.then we bought a cake at secret recipe.cheese cake.because babah love it so much.so last two day,i have unrest weekend.shopping for babah n along.love u guys.

GT Japan 2009

2009-06-19T08:38:00.003+08:00

OMG!!just now i heard the interview between Flyfm and two of the GT racer.
they from PETRONAS TOM'S SC430 team. the racers are Juichi Wakisaka and Andre Lotterer.
juichi is from japan.so they have their own translater since that he can't undersatand english very well.
but i'm really excited.
how i wish i can watch the race live.
go Petronas team.i will support u!!

fever

2009-06-18T09:24:00.002+08:00

i hate fever.
because Dr. Ghazali will give me alots of medicine.
and i have to finish it all.

i hate fever.
my head won't stop spinning.
and both of my sister 'malas nk urut kepale angah'.

i hate fever.
because i felt hot and cold at the same time.
and i'll sleep uncomfortably.

i hate fever.
because i can't go to work.
and haji(my boss) will ask everyone where am i.(since i'm his favourite)

i hate fever.
i hate fever.
i hate fever.

wani's bf~~~adi atiq(real name afiq adi)

2009-06-17T08:44:00.003+08:00

hahahaha...wani's boyfriend.the one who holds the video camera.in the toilet.last dance he's wearing maroon colour t-shirt.during the 'chicken dance' he stand on left-hand side.hahahaha.adi~~~next time we meet...we(iza,me n wani) will dance for you.

3 + 1

2009-06-16T15:07:00.004+08:00

last sunday outing.after 10 months wani was at UK studying.so this is her 1st time meeting 'abg mape' after reaching malaysia.

so our day are all packed with little-sister-plans.we went to watch "Night at the museum 2"...karaoke...n photography session at everywhere.

this is one of my favourite picture.show how we were connected and committed with each other.all the 'lipat' jeans n holding our own high heels is 'his' idea.which until now i think it so sexy!seeing a part of our legs.with that funky high heels(i bought it on the same day.n wear it at the same day)both my sisters also like this picture.n not forgotten my mum.seeing her sweet girls.posing with different pose.she is going to 'cuci' the picture at the biggest size and frame it.then 'gantung' at living room.hahahaha.

so thank you.really can't make it without you.next time we include adi(wani's bf) also.so that wani and adi can do all their 'manje2' pose.hahahaha.i don't think adi have any problems to pose in front of the camera kan!!!don't you think so wani?hahahaha.

my lil sis

2009-06-04T09:18:00.005+08:00

my lil sis...this is a story about her.
since her holidays started on 21 may 2009 i have a sleeping partner.
but every morning i woke up her face is about 2 inches from my face.
leg or hand touches my body(whichever she can reach).
or butt to butt(either one of these).
no matter which side of bed i slept.
i wondering how she sleeps at her hostel.
maybe she missess sleeping near with someone.
ermmm so when wani come back from UK.
i wondering how does she sleeps?
as same as iza?
then i will be the 'cheese between the bread'.

counting day mode:4 days

2009-06-02T10:44:00.003+08:00

seriously...can't wait for those 4 days.hahahaha.my sis will be here.spending her summer holiday in Malaysia.dum dum dum.we(me and iza) busy preparing plans for us to enjoy our life out.some of the plans included mum and dad.but some i prefer not to bring them(takut diorg penat).

so i was thinking how should i react when seeing you walking towards us.should i scream and running towards you,giving you the-unbreathe-hug OR i just give mum the chance to do that OR i give you no-word-looks?ermmmm...

anyway...really can't wait for THE DAY!!you can help me by making me forget about wasting-time-and-effort life.which i think it's so useless.angry mostly.sad most of the time.silent crying(no-sound-making-but-alots-of-tears).maybe you have any email address or phone number to give me!!hahahaha.i can make it useful.hahahaha.

SATURDAY...pls come faster...

babah & mama

2009-06-01T10:43:00.002+08:00

the most important persons in my life.lately i realized something.usually going to work by 7:30am.to avoid all the 'wasting-my-time-traffic jam'.but by 6:15am i'm already waked up.solat subuh.keeping my laptop in the bag.gosok my tudung.cari baju nk pkai for today.dum dum dum.by 6:30am i must be by the door.helping mum push her troli and angkat masuk dlm kereta.

finish helping.the most important adegan every morning.when i'm still alive.salam both of my parents.first salam babah dulu.then bru mama.because mum will always asked for more.

"muah muah"kissing her both cheek.

"lagi!"mama asked.

"ala xnkla.busukla.xmandi lg nie"me saying(mmg xmandi lg pn time tu.after both of them hilang dr pandangan mate brula pegi mandi)

"ala mcmla mama xpenah cium dier busuk2"mama saying.

"ala xnkla"me saying back.

"ahh i don't care!!"mama grab my face n gomol me.kissing my cheek.my mouth.every part of my face which that she can reach.

"ok dh2.cukup!"me begging her to stop.

"ok dh.nnti drive baik2 eyh pegi keje"mama pesan

"ok i will.bye ma"me saying.

my one-of-the-must-do-thing-everyday.

mad...ne-yo <3

2009-06-01T09:36:00.006+08:00

Oh oh oh, oh oh oh...
Oh oh oh...

[Verse 1]

She's starin' at me,
I'm sittin', wonderin' what she's thinkin'.
Mmmmm
Nobody's talkin',
'Cause talkin' just turns into screamin'.
Ohhh...
And now is I'm yellin' over her,
She's yellin' over me.
All that that means
Is neither of us is listening,
(And what's even worse).
That we don't even remember why were fighting.

So both of us are mad for...

[Hook]

Nothin'
(Fighting for).
Nothin'
(Crying for).
Nothin'
(Whoahhh).
But we won't let it go for
Nothin'
(No not for)
Nothin'.
This should be nothin' to a love like what we got.
Ohhh, baby...

I know sometimes
It's gonna rain...
But baby, can we make up now
'Cause I can't sleep through the pain
(Cant sleep through the pain).

[Chorus]

Girl, I don't wanna go to bed
(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed
(Mad at me).
No, I don't wanna go to bed
(Mad at you),
And I don't want you to go to bed
(Mad at me)
Ohhh no no no...

[Verse 2]

And it gets me upset, girl
When you're constantly accusing.
(Askin' questions like you've already known).
We're fighting this war, baby
When both of us are losing.
(This ain't the way that love is supposed to go).

Whoaaaaaaaaa...
[What happened to workin' it out].

p/s: this song is specially dedicated to YOU(yes...you know it's you).i love this song.and everytime i heard this song played on the radio.suddenly out of nowhere...YOU were there,smiling,saying "Dhla.xpyh marah2."

icha's birthday celebration...

2009-04-28T10:45:00.005+08:00

mum told me about the celebration. but mum don't told me what time.
so i assume it cancel.
then Datin call me...'Angah kt mane? Kami sume tggu angah. Pn. Zaili xbgtau ke?'
'ehh Datin...mama ade bgtau. tp mama xbgtau bile'
'ala yeke angah. xpela. kiteorg tggu angah kt KLCC. angah dtg tau. kene gak dtg. sbb icha requested for u'
alamak...ermmm nk xnk kenela pegi. about 1 hour and the half bru smpai KLCC.

the 1st picture...with icha n althaf.
n my 'rosak' face...
i hate my face in this picture...
but both of them r so adorable...

hahahaha... 2nd picture was taken by 8 years old boy.
Althaf(saya la bf angah.angah xblh cari bf bru.angah kene tggu saya besar!)
his words to me.
iye sayang. angah tggu smpai Althaf besar.

MELAKA

2009-04-23T07:59:00.003+08:00

last monday...
'kakak...i'm at the clinic.'my lil sis called me.
'yaaa...what happen?'
'doctor told me that my blood pressure is very low. and he gave me medicine for that.'
'why don't you just come home n see our own doctor.'
'i can't go back just like that. i must have a reason. a solid one.'
~~me silent~~

last tuesday...
'kakak...my eyes swollen.'
'what happen?'
'i think the effect of the medicine. i think.'
'then stop taking that thing.'
'but mum asked me to follow doctor's prescription.'
~~me silent~~

last night...
'angah...tomorrow mama n along will fetch adik at melake after my classes finish. so you stay home with babah. ok?'
'ok mum.'

today...
mama
along
apei
abg..............................MELAKA

apei's art work

2009-04-22T08:46:00.002+08:00

I LIKE IT!!!SUKE!!TQ!!SARANYEE!!

today

2009-04-22T07:48:00.002+08:00

'pity itam.always being left alone at home',mama said.

'a'aa ma.pity itam.why don't we find itam a friend?',i'm giving my suggestion.

'JANGAN NAK NGADA2!'

hahahaha funny but true. mama nk bela kucing lg. wow that will be a miracle. hahahaha

anyway,on my way to work fly fm really make me smile. they playing a moderate song la. xberape minatla. but i can go with anything that need movement involvement. hahahaha. the songs are:-
1)magic by ciara ft justin timberlake
2)as long as you love me by backstreet boys
3)if i were a boy by beyonce
4)all my life by kc and jojo
5)tatoo by jordin sparks
6)right now (na na na) by akon
7)if you want be my lover by spice girls

and today wake up call by fly fm is the sweetest wake up call ever. so sweet. who's that guy name. i forgotten. his gf ask fly fm to wake him up. with a message 'baby, today fly fm will wake you up. love you always'. then the bf reply ON AIR 'i love you always too' and give her a smooch. sweet!! really makes me smile...

7 things that makes me totally sick of this world today!!

2009-04-21T08:26:00.004+08:00

1) stupid drivers which not only risk their life but also mine.(stupid!)

2) my working attire is wet because of the rain.(but i'm not blaming the rain. i'm blaming myself 'sbb letak payung merata2, lps tu xjmpe!)

3) itam wake me up 3 am in the morning.(sbb takut bunyi ujan. fyi cat have a sharp hearing sense)

4) boss masuk lambat!(who's gonna approve my cashflow??!!my seminar is on friday!)

5) idiot drivers 'yg terlalu kedekut' to give me way.(dah ko tu terhegeh2 sape suh!aku masuk la!bodoh!)

6) and someone who is too tension, berat mulut nk ckp! then,i'm the punchbag. out of nowhere, dh kene tegur! ahh malas la kalo org mcmni. makan ati tau! kalo bgtau kite pahamla kan! ni tetibe je! pissed off btul la.

7) unsincerely apologizing. (baik xpayah!!)

itam's art work

2009-04-20T08:41:00.002+08:00

See...my cat's art work. Very nice. Very creative. But the problems is that the art is on my hand. Blood involvement is there. A bit of tears. And depreciation on my 'hantaran'. Hahahaha...

Yesterday on my left hand (no picture were taken). As a conclusion, you get 2 'rotan' from me. One on your right hand. One on your right feet. Sorry, but I have to discipline you. You are doing your 'art work' without any purpose. Without I'm doing any wrong. Tp angah bwk pegi jalan2 kan lepas tu!!

XOXOX

blank mind

2009-04-19T21:30:00.003+08:00

Thinking about the past days how I waste my life chasing the things I want. But lately I realized that, I got all what I wanted. And I tried to get what I want with my own afford. Some afford really need sacrifice. Which I kind doing that quite alot lately.

How eager I am to get what I want. But something really hint back on my head. What do I have to do next when I got what I want? I have nothing to chase. Nothing to fulfill my passion. The eagerity faded away. So I decided to go back at one. Think back what I want but I still don't have it. A hard work really needed here.

***blank mind*** I can't figure out any passion for the time being. So I just stick to the old one. Until YOU have a job with Kd. Can I follow you? I really wanted to find the new passion.

XOXOX

birthday celebration

2009-04-19T20:36:00.004+08:00

10 things I love about my birthday celebration.

1) I'm kind of flattered by the way you treated me that day.

2) Too much of eating. By the way it's does't do any harm. Which lately I like to eat.

3) You fulfill one of my dreams. Becoming a 'one step model' which I don't have any skill doing that.

4) Nice black shirt from Hush Puppies Apparel.

5) Relationship advisor. You are so bold and so protective and a bit of jealousy(or just me thinking of that!)

6) You like my dressing.(Really hoping you like it!Because it takes an hour for me to decide what to wear that day!)

7) Really interested in becoming a ***e model(kind of sexy huh!)

8) It's that for real when you told me about the ring?(which I'm still wondering)

9) Very impressive wedding card.

10) I can't stop smiling. And mama really 'takut' because I don't stop smiling. And mama is too eager to know what happen. Hahaha it's so her.

XOXOX

terer kan!

2009-03-12T12:43:00.000+08:00

KOMUN...

2009-03-03T11:33:00.003+08:00

Of course I can handle 6 years old childrens
But most of my students is below 6 years old
I can handle them
But I can't handle the marking work
Seriously
To much to mark

handle me

2009-02-26T23:34:00.002+08:00

I don't even know wth 'NETWORKING" is!
How unsuccessful I am now
Anyway~~~~~
Can I handle 6 years old childrens?
I'll let you know on Tuesday

XOXOX

sudoku...

2009-02-19T08:42:00.001+08:00

You try for 1st time...
Then, you will become addicted...
Like me...

XOXOX

am I a dream catcher?

2009-02-18T10:18:00.002+08:00

am I?
me myself..I'm still asking the question!
what is my dreams?
can my dreams come true if I try very hard?
maybe it will!
who knows!

XOXOX

i figure it out...

2009-02-17T10:37:00.001+08:00

Bile install Adobe Flash je...
Trus blog jd mcmnie...
Now I know what is the problem!!
Hahaha...how clever I am!!!

XOXOX

widgets...

2009-02-16T09:47:00.002+08:00

I have to remove all my widgets...
My fav. songs :(
My counting days with YOU :(
My unstoppable watch :(
Boring blog~~~~~~~~

XOXOX

happy birthday...

2009-02-15T21:35:00.001+08:00

Happy birthday bah...
May Allah grant u health n wealth (mostly on your health)...
U da greatest dad ever...
I love you...

XOXOX

why this thing happen...

2009-02-15T21:22:00.001+08:00

I can't open my own blog...
I tried n I gave up...
So should I ask for help or just close my account?

XOXOX

confused!

2009-02-13T10:38:00.004+08:00

How stupid I felt when I post on my blog, no one is reading it!!
I want to make it secretly but it's doesn't make any sense.
And now, more confused I become.

XOXOX

no valentine's day for me...

2009-02-12T11:57:00.002+08:00

I'm celebrating valentine's day with.....MY SIS.
Xdpt lg!!
Sume pn xdpt!!

XOXOX

karaoke songs...

2009-02-11T10:01:00.002+08:00

1) Widuri - Broery Marantika
2) Lagu Jiwa Lagu Cinta - Mawi ft M.Nasir
3) The Actor - Micheal Learns To Rock
4) Memburu Rindu - Hattan
5) Tapi Bukan Aku - Kerispatih
6) Hanya Kau Yang Mampu - Aizat
7) Aku Semut Merah - Yabang
8) Harapan - Fazli Zainal
9) Angan dan Sedar - Mawi
10) Kian - Mawi
11) Kehebatan Cinta - Jamal Abdillah & Francesca Peter

*will be updated time to time*

XOXOX

i'm sorry...

2009-02-10T11:43:00.003+08:00

Sejak operation ni, bah mcm cepat terase, sensitif and byk complaint skit. Hehehe the new babah.

Hari ni, before going off to the office. Biasela, amik my favourite CD dlm kete mama and my sunglassess. So bwk handbag n laptop masuk kete dulu. And xlupe my 'bekal air'. Hehehe. So babah pandang serong je. Maybe was thinking that ' Ishh anak aku nie, pegi keje xnak salam dgn aku!'. From the look, I bet that is your words.

Hahaha lepas letak my both bag dlm kete. Start enjin. Amik CD and sunglassess. Masuk rmh blk. Letak kunci kete mama. Then, 'Bah, angah pegi keje eyh'. Salam and cium tangan babah. Terus dier senyum. Then, 'Angah balik awal ke hari nie?'. 'Ermm tengokla bah. Kalo Uncle masuk balik mcm biasela kot. Kalo xmasuk baru balik awal. Hehehehe.' Then, barula nak senyum. Tadi sblm salam bkn main masam lg muke dier.

Hahaha dad, I'm your daughter. Mestila angah salam babah sblm pegi keje. That's my responsibility. Love you dad.

XOXOX

how pathetic my life is...

2009-02-09T18:56:00.002+08:00

1) I still don't have any special boyfriend.

2) I can finish a game in a day. Seems there is nothing I can do besides that.

3) I can't watch movie beause I still don't get my 2 months salary.

4) I'm laying on my bed looking blankly to my laptop.

5) My laptop can't install any games except for the original game.

6) I'm depress because of my 'lack-social-life'.

7) My credit only left RM1.85.

8) I been going up and down for at least 200 times.

9) I've been watching 'Gossip Girl' for 100 times. And I can rememerized the dialogue.

10)I've been admiring myself in the mirror for at least 4 hours a day. And I've been talking to myself and to a mirror.

11)I'm dying inside which in 2 days I will become a zombie. I only eat, sleep, pee and poop. How pathetic my life is...

******* I NEED MY SOCIAL LIFE BACK!!!PLSSSS.........*******

XOXOX

being bored again...

2009-02-09T10:48:00.001+08:00

Please sms me back...

I sent you 2 sms, but you reply none...

XOXOX

timeless journey...

2009-02-09T10:40:00.002+08:00

Whatever you do, and whatever your plan is. I'll support you. That's what friend for. Supporting each other. And stand by their side when they need you.

Seriously, I'm glad you don't go for that interview. At least God heard my prayers. One of my prayers. The rest will take time because I believe in You. You will give something good to someone, if that someone being good to all man kind. Right!!

So tq for the timeless journey. Even I'm mad at first...tapi awak pandai pujuk!! And maybe I cepat cair. Hahahaha either one la. I don't mind pun if you choose 'I cepat cair'. Because that's me. I can't change who I am, but I can change my surrounding factors.

XOXOX

jennifer hudson - one night only

2009-02-04T21:36:00.001+08:00

you want all my love
and my devotion
you want my love and soul
right on the line
I have no doubt,
that I could love you, forever
the only trouble is
you really don’t have the time

you’ve got one night only
one night only
that’s all I have to spare
one night only
let’s not pretend to care
one night only
one night only
come on, come on baby come on
one night only
we only have till dawn

in the morning
this feeling will be gone
it has no chance going on
something so right
has got no chance to live
so let’s forget about chances
it’s one night I will give

one night only
one night only
you’ll be the only one
one night only
then you’ll have to run
one night only
one night only
there's nothing more to stay
one night only
what's getting in the way

one night only
one night only
one night only

pemandu berbahaya...

2009-02-04T14:59:00.005+08:00

Ermmm sejak keje kt tmpt bru biasenye drive ulang-alik ke rmh. Sblm ni carpool dgn mama n babah. Now I realized something that...I become a dangerous driver when I drive everyday. Mgkin sbb dh tau jalan. Mgkin sbb saya dh blh bace pemikiran pemandu lain. Mgkin sbb saya dh jd selfish...like some other drivers. Sape tau. Tp ape yg saya tau. Saya perasan yg saya sudah mule memandu secara berbahaya. Hari ni je 3 kali kene hon dgn pemandu lain. Ermmm mybe tomorrow I will start become a careful driver. Itu janji saya. Sbb kalo pikir2 blk, kalo accident ke. Takutnye...

Lg satu pn sbb mama lagi percaya driving org lain dr anak dier sendiri. She prefer YOU than me. Kalo x, xkanla mama suh cucuk lidi ade air asam kan. (Time tu tgh makan jambu dgn serbuk asam boi) Hahahaha...My promise today. I will become a careful driver.

XOXOX

ala3 comelnye...geram...

2009-01-27T09:08:00.001+08:00

geramnye....

2009-01-25T22:57:00.002+08:00

Biasenye weekends mmg kene teman mama pegi beli barang dapur. Mama's favourite place is Tesco. Biasela. Kt sane brg mcm2 ade dan harga pn berpatutan. So hr nie pegila teman mama dgn iza(adik saya yg last) pegi beli brg dapur. Sbnrnye mmg xsuke sgt2 nk pegi Tesco. Sbb saya nie cepat rimas dkt tmpt2 yg ramai org nie. Xtahan la. Saya jenis yg, kalo saya nk bende tu saya cari. Then, trus bayar dan gerak. Tapi kalo shopping dgn mama. Aduhai...mcm2 yg dier nk beli. Nk tgk2 lg. Yg mane best. Mmg rimas. Tp sape yg nk teman ibu sendiri kalo bkn anaknye sendiri. Itu dh tanggungjawab saya. I have to like it.

So bile pegi Tesco, dgn ramai2 org. So mcm2 ragam orgla yg kite blh tgk. Bende yg saya paling geram...paling marah ialah meletakkan troli di tgh2 jalan. Ya Allah, marahnye. Geramnye. Xreti bahase ke ape? Xde common sense ke ape? Xboleh pikir ke ape? Mcmniela. Tesco tu kan tmpt awam. Ape kate bile kite kt tmpt awam jgn jd selfish. Pentingkan diri sendiri. Kenape nk letak troli tgh2 jalan? Tkut org lain amik brg kite? Name pn Tesco. Brg berlambak2. Cari je la. Yg nk amik dlm troli org tu buat ape. Saya mmg xpaham. Mmg typical org Malaysia mcm nie ke? Mmg kene gelakla kalo kite pegi negara org. Smpai td saya terpaksa mengalihkan troli org lain sbb dh tentu troli tu menyekat jalan org lain. Padahal tuannya berdiri betul2 sebelah troli tu. Peduli ape saya. Nk maki. Maki la. Saya blh maki blk. Saya blh ckp "Abg, abg xde otak ke ltk troli tgh2 jalan nie? Abg ingat org buat Tesco ni untuk abg ke?" Tp tu la, mama slalu ckp. Saya dpt kesabaran ayah saya. Slagi blh sabar, saya sabar. Tp saya tau abg tu tau dier bersalah. Sbb tu dier tgk je saya tolak troli dier ke tepi.

Lg satu. Kalo kite perasan, sume shopping complex menyediakan 'zebra crossing'. Kalo kt UK, pemandu akan automatically berhenti bile nmpk org nk melintas menggunakan 'zebra crossing'. Tp bkn org Malaysia. Lagi dier nmpk org nk lintas, lg dier nk laju. Nasib baik driver td tu xlanggar nenek tua. Ade tu siap stop dkt 'zebra crossing', sikat2 rmbt, tekan2 pedal minyak kereta. Sbb ade 2 org gadis nk melintas. Ya Allah, xpahamnye. Tlgla. Ape masalah skrg ni. Ape kes.

Bile pikir blk, knape la blh jd mcmnie? Knape la kite slalu lupe nk gunakan nikmat yg Allah beri. Allah beri kite otak ade byk sbb. Tp kite xgunakan untuk satu sbb pn. Bkn saya nk kondem tp kadangkala saya tau ramai yg penah terpikir bende2 nie. Kite mampu mengubahnya. Tp bile...???

so true!!!

2009-01-23T13:16:00.003+08:00

Fine : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

Five Minutes : If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

Nothing : This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

Go Ahead : This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

Loud Sigh : This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

That's Okay : This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

Thanks : A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

Whatever : Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!

Don't worry about it, I got it : Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

* Send this to the men you know, to warn them about arguments they can avoid if they remember the terminology.

* Send this to all the women you know to give them a good laugh, cause they know it's true!!!

Hahahaha...I admit most of that is true...

xreti bahasa ke ape..??

2009-01-23T12:22:00.002+08:00

Ermm biasenye hari Jumaat the best day of the week. Biasela, esok cuti. Sabtu kan! This week dgn Chinese New Year lg. Mmg bestla kan! So start Sabtu smpai Selasa. Hehehe. Tp saya cuti smpai Isnin mggu depan2. Selasa minggu depan2 bru start keje. Saja cuti. Nak release tension. And nak rest abis2. Can help mum at home. Jaga babah.

But today..ala fail la hari ni. Kenape la 'bdk nie' xpaham bahasa. Pelikla. Dh ckp Bahasa Malaysia pn xpaham gak. Dh ckp Bahasa Inggeris pn xpaham gak. Nk ckp Arab xterer sgt. Sbb dulu mase blaja amik Arab sebagai bahasa ketiga. Tp untuk 2 semester je. Ehh tiga. Ehh dua. Ala xingat la. Blaja pn yg senang2 punye. Nombor, hari, bulan, alat tulis, makanan dan lain2. So skrg nie dh xtau dh nk ckp bahasa ape.

Mngarut bende bkn2. Ishh fade-up la. Dh xlayan pn xreti bahasa. Nape la blh jadi mcm nie? Xlaratla. Terus hilang mood nk keje. So to u, if u happen to read my blog. Tp pastinye kamu xkan membace, kerana kamu xtau saya mempunyai blog. Xnk pn kamu tau. Tolongla...I'm begging you. I don't know what to do. Can you just forget about me? It's like we never met. You don't know me and I didn't know you. Time2 mcm nie rasenye bile pikir blk bestnye kalo ade alat menghilangkan ingatan mcm dlm crite Men In Black tu kan!!!!

3rd day after operation...

2009-01-20T09:33:00.003+08:00

Smlm mmg terase amat2 malas nk pegi keje. Tp kalo xpegi keje kang xde org plak nk jaga office. So I decided pegi keje tp lewat skit. So saya sms one of my colleague, bgtau I'm gonna be a bit late to the office. Lps tu terase mcm malas plak nk pegi office. So saya call kawan sekerja saya, tnye sape ade kt office? Big boss ade. Alamak!! Nak xnak kene gak pegi office. So dgn berat hatinye pegila office.

Smpai je office sume tnye, how's my father? Sume ok. Operation ok. Smlm dh bercakap2 dh. Asking everything. Including sape menang pilihanraya KT. That's my dad. Lps tu masuk office. Bukak laptop. Then dgr lagu. Lps tu mate ni berat je. Maybe sbb penat hari Ahad tu xhilang lg kan. Lps tu big boss dtg masuk office. Tnye soalan yg same. So saya pn jawab jawapan yg same. Ok...good. Alhamdullilah.

About an hour duk dlm office, big boss masuk lg. Dier tnye, ape buat kat sini? Saya pn mcm tercengang la kan. Buat ape lg. Buat keje la. Lps tu big boss ckp "Dh2 pegila blk. Buat ape yg patut. Pegi hospital tgk babah. Xpe. Hari nie blh balik. Balik2." Hai mcm menghalau pn ade gak. Tp mmg menghalau pn. Saya dlm keadaan terkejut ni mcm dh kene stun plak. "Dh ape lg. Kemasla barang2." Kene halau lg. Ermmm big boss dh bg balik xkan nk keje plak kan! So packing2 brg lps tu gerak.

So tq boss. Bertuah dpt keje dgn boss saya nie. Memahami sungguh. Hehehe mane xmemahami. Dier dgn babah saya geng menge'teh' kt kedai mamak. So tq Uncle. Really appreciate it. =)

Approval…

2009-01-20T09:29:00.001+08:00

Ermm. Smlm dh 2 hari babah kt ICU. But he seem ok. Babah is always ok. Babah kuat. Hahaha. So smlm ramai family dtg melawat babah kt ICU including you. So I’m so flaterred in how you can get along with my family. Especially bile awak berborak dgn nenek dekat sinki. Time tu nenek nak basuh tangan. Awak berborak dgn nenek. I saw because I was looking for you. It’s so sweet. Kalo la saya ade camera time tu, that will be my favourite picture ever. So you have met some of my family and most of them saying good things about you. Belum jumpe sume skali tu. Hahaha. Suke sgt bile awak blh suaikan diri awak dgn my family. You know how to get along very well. Jealous because I don’t have that skill. Maybe better for me to learn from you.

Satu lg sweet moment is when you shake hand with babah. Rase nk nangis ade gak. Babah smiles when you came in. Babah looked at you with his dim eyes. Still craggy but he remember you. And he knows you. He appreciate that you came to visit him. And his daughter appreciates it to. Two out of three my favourite guys in the ICU room with me. I’m the luckiest person ever.

Then, we are having a talk. Pasal bende remeh-temeh je. Tapi now I know what I didn’t know at first place. Then, I did confess about things. About me mostly. So I’m not blaming you if you can’t accept me for who I am. I’m so sorry about my bad habit. I’ll try to change it with your help. You’re willing to help me. And I appreciate it and I won’t waste my chances. I really glad we have these talks.

And my favourite moments are two twiggies, satu minuman tin and dua gula2 asam. Hahaha. Eating at our own created ‘taman’. Bkn taman pn sebenarnye. Tp mcm taman sbb bwh pokok besar. Eating and talking. Eating and talking. Teasing. Eating and talking. Eating and talking. Cakap pasal bende remeh-temeh je. But you know what. Bile kite berborak pasal bende remeh-temeh ni bru kite kenal sape diri kite yg sebenarnye. Don’t you think so? We do the talking most of the time. Kan! I like it when I can hear you’re talking. Walaupun bende remeh-temeh, tp kalo dibandingkan dgn saya yg lagi remeh-temeh ni. Hahaha. So we suit each other.

i will be

2009-01-15T16:33:00.002+08:00

*This song i dedicate for you. So that you will know what you mean to me, sayang. Tq for being there for me. I really can't make it without you.*

There's nothing I could say to you
Nothing I could ever do to make you see
What you mean to me

All the pain, the tears I cried
Still you never said goodbye and now I know
How far you'd go

I know I let you down
But it's not like that now
This time I'll never let you go

I will be, all that you want
And gather myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart
All my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything OK

I thought that I had everything
I didn't know what life could bring
But now I see, honestly

You're the one thing I got right
The only one I let inside
Now I can breathe, cause you're here with me

And if I let you down
I'll turn it all around
Cause I would never let you go

I will be, all that you want
And gather myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart
All my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything OK

Cause without you I cant breathe
I'm not gonna ever, ever let you leave
You're all I've got, you're all I want
Yeah

And without you I don't know what I'd do
I can never, ever live a day without you
Here with me, do you see,
You're all I need

I will be, all that you want
And gather myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart
All my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything OK

I will be, all that you want
And gather myself together
Cause you keep me from falling apart
All my life, I'll be with you forever
To get you through the day
And make everything OK

True Love and Pain

2009-01-15T11:24:00.001+08:00

Jane is a typical college girl who enjoys life to the fullest. She loves her boyfriend so much and texts him every now and then.

Mark is Jane's boyfriend who works in a call center in los angeles. He's always busy doing so many things. He only manage to reply to Jane's texts when he got off from work. One time mark receive a message from jane : "hi baby! how are you? i miss you! call my house when u get home..take care! i love you!"

mark ignored the message because he always receive the same message whenever it is time for him to go home from work.

"baby, i miss you..did u eat yet?! Take care when you get home! ill be waiting for your call..i love you!"

"baby, where are you?! its unfair that you don't reply to my texts... well, im just gonna wait for your call..i love you!"

Mark reaches home and lay on his bed. The last time he knew is that he's reading Jane's text. He was so tired he fall asleep and wasn't able to return jane's call. He can still hear his phone beeps but he's too tired to take a glimpse on the message.

When he woke up the next day, he remembers that he needs to call Jane. He ignored the messages and dialed Jane's .. No one's answering in her house. He called up her cellphone and he was surprised that her father answered the call. In his voice you can feel his tears and hear his heart tearing apart.

"Mark, why havent you called?. Jane was waiting for your call all night!"

"Dad im sorry. i fell asleep being so tired from work... i was calling your house but no one was answering. where are you? so i can come over."

"Just meet me at jane's house." Mark went to Jane's house and much to his surprised he saw a lot of people inside. The house were so lighted but you can see the gloom on every person you'll meet there. He was greeted by Jane's mom on tears. She hug him tight and cried on his shoulders.

"Jane was waiting for you. She didn't come with us because she was waiting for your call. She was killed by robbers that broke in our house. She's gone , Mark. She's gone !!!

"thats impossible..she texted me..how could this happen!"

Mark can't look who's inside the coffin. He can't move and it feels like his whole body is stuck on the chair hes seating on. He wanted to cry but it seems that something is blocking his tears to fall down. He turned to his phone and read the messages of Jane.

"baby, im not coming with my mom and dad..im just gonna wait for your call.."

"baby..im so scared... it seems like theres someone downstairs..please call me now!"

"babe..someones here..they might kill me..please call me now, where are you? i need you here... "

"baby... . i love you!... " the last message from JANE

He wanted to shout and cry so loud. It's true that Jane is waiting for his call. Up to her last breath she only thinks about him.

He stared at Jane inside the coffin. Suddenly tears starts flowing down his cheeks. He can't say anything. The only words he uttered... "My baby, i'm so sorry! I could have known, i could have fought for you! i'm really sorry! I love you sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much!"

Now, pass this on right after you've read it.. only if you really love someone enough to do so

***Moral of the story... .when someone message you... please reply..

Dance With My Father

2009-01-15T10:04:00.000+08:00

Back when I was a child, before life removed all the innocence
My father would lift me high and dance with my mother and me and then
Spin me around ‘til I fell asleep
Then up the stairs he would carry me
And I knew for sure I was loved
If I could get another chance, another walk, another dance with him
I’d play a song that would never, ever end
How I’d love, love, love
To dance with my father again

When I and my mother would disagree
To get my way, I would run from her to him
He’d make me laugh just to comfort me
Then finally make me do just what my mama said
Later that night when I was asleep
He left a dollar under my sheet
Never dreamed that he would be gone from me
If I could steal one final glance, one final step, one final dance with him
I’d play a song that would never, ever end
‘Cause I’d love, love, love
To dance with my father again

Sometimes I’d listen outside her door
And I’d hear how my mother cried for him
I pray for her even more than me
I pray for her even more than me
I know I’m praying for much too much
But could you send back the only man she loved
I know you don’t do it usually
But dear Lord she’s dying
To dance with my father again
Every night I fall asleep and this is all I ever dream

15 Jan 2009 datang jua...

2009-01-15T09:34:00.003+08:00

Selama ni saya berdoa sgt2 14 Jan 2009 tu akan jadi hari yg org terase lame sgt. Tp apakan daya. Masa sering meninggalkan kita. Akhirnya datang jua 15 Jan 2009. Hari yg bakal mengubah sebahagian dr hidup kami sekeluarga. Especially me as a daughter and as a big sister to my two sisters.

So skrg ni hp pn saya letak kt sblh laptop. Easier for me to answer any phone call and to read any message receive. So mama akan update all the info to me. Bilik mane. Tingkat brape. Automatically my daily routine will change. Slalunye abis keje trus balik rmh. Tggu mama n babah blk then pegi dinner same2. But after this no more. Abis je keje straight away pegi hospital. Accompany my dad n mym mum. Dgn along skali.

So dad, don't worry. I can handle this. A piece of cake. If I'm feel that it's to hard for me, someone will help me to go through. Give me strength and everything he can. Angah tau babah tau sape. Hehehe. So dad, you can count on me. I know you knew. So you just have a big rest. I will take care of mum, along, wani n iza. I'm grateful I'm your daughter. This will teach me how to become a better person like you. You are the greatest dad ever. I love you. Always and forever. Always and forever. Always and forever.

Dangerously In Love 2

2009-01-14T12:53:00.001+08:00

I love you... I love you... I love you

Baby I love you
You are my life
My happiest moments weren't complete
If you weren't by my side
You're my relation
In connection to the sun
With you next to me
There's no darkness I can't overcome
You are my raindrop
I am the seed
With you and God, who's my sunlight
I bloom and grow so beautifully
Baby, I'm so proud
So proud to be your girl
You make the confusion
Go all away
From this cold and mixed up world

I am in love with you
You set me free
I can't do this thing
Called life without you here with me
Cause I'm Dangerously In Love with you
I'll never leave
Just keep lovin' me
The way I love you loving me

And I know you love me
Love me for who I am
Cause years before I became who I am
Baby you were my man
I know it ain't easy
Easy loving me
I appreciate the love and dedication
From you to me
Later on in my destiny
I see myself having your child
I see myself being your wife
And I see my whole future in your eyes
Thought of all my love for you
sometimes make me wanna cry
Realize all my blessings
I'm grateful
To have you by my side

Every time I see your face
My heart smiles
Every time it feels so good
It hurts sometimes
Created in this world
To love and to hold
To feel
To breathe
To love you

Dangerously in love
Can't do this thing
I love you , I love you, I love you
I'll never leave
Just keep on loving me
I'm in love with you
I can not do
I cannot do anything without you in my life
Holding me, kissing me, loving me
Dangerously
I love you
Dangerously in love

jejak kasih...???

2009-01-14T12:06:00.000+08:00

Supposely, biasenye saya tulis blog dlm pkul 9 pg. Tapi hr ni dtg keje lmbt skit. Ade bende nk kene settlekan kt rmh. Tp dh bgtau dh officemate dtg keje lmbt skit hr ni. Lambat xlambat kire2 pkul 9:30 pg smpaila office. Mcm biase dh parking kete kene bayar tiket parking. Lps tu bru naik office.

Smpai2 je office bukak laptop. Then, pegi masak air sbb xsempat breakfast td. Lps tu pasang Celcom Broadband n bukak Internet Explorer. So biasenye check blog dulu tp ntah kenape hari nie nk check Facebook dulu. Check2 dpt satu msg dr stranger. Seorg lelaki. Berumur 29 thun la. Dalam msg tu dier ckp muke saya mcm familiar. Dier tnye membesar kat mane. Saya blsla, bgtau saya membesar di ITM Segamat (time tu xtukar lg pada Uitm). Lps tu dier tnye blk, sblm tu duk kt Taman Sri Waja ke. Saya dh bertambah pelik. Mcmane org nie blh tau. Sbb itu dh 21 tahun yg lepas. Then saya jwb, iye. Tp masa tu kecik lg. 4 tahun kot. Dier minta phone number. Saya mule2 mcm was2 nk bg. Then xpela. Kalo btul2 dier ni nk kaco saya, dier call saya xpayahla layan. Tp hati ni suh bg. So saya pn bgla no phone saya.

Xsampai 2 minit, org tu call. Then the first name dier panggil 'Angah eyh?'. Aik mcmane dier tau name manje saya. Borak2 rupe2nye abg nie dulu mak dier (mummy) penah jaga kiteorg. Masa tu saya bru 4 thun. Abg tu sound so excited. Dier bgtau saya, dh bertahun2 dier try cari family saya. Dh 9 thun dier mencari. Dier bersyukur2 sgt dpt jmpe blk saya. Mummy pn happy sgt2. Xcaya tgk gmbr saya. Sbb dh besar sgt. 21 thun terpisah.

I'm so excited sbb my mum pn pernah berusaha mencari mummy. Tp xdpt. Mmg lost contact la. I know that my mum is gonna be happy because she's been trying to find her. Lame dh mencari. So abg Erin (hahaha same plak dgn name saya. Tp name saya ejaan dier Eryn), i'm so lucky u found me. Really can't wait to see u, mummy n da rest of your family. Abg jgn lost contact lg eyh. Tp kalo lost contact I'll know u'll find me. Like u used to. Nnti kite kenang kembali kenangan kite same2. Main toy same2, main basikal, kaco angsa...hahaha it's was fun. And TQ Allah sbb ketemukan kami kembali. Really can't wait to hear mummy voice. Hehehe....

si itam <3

2009-01-13T09:45:00.006+08:00

Ni la itam. Name sebenar stokin. Tp panggil2 xdtg2. So bile panggil itam dtg plak. So tukarla name. But I still think 'stokin' is a better name for her. Yup, the cat is a she. Tp muke boyish kan!! Even I bought a pink colour bangle, you still look like a male cat. But it's ok. I still love you.

Inila penawar rindu, teman bergaduh, teman menangis, teman makan, teman tido, teman jalan2...sumela. Sbb kt rmh dh xde sesiape except for bah & ma la. Along duk rmh die lg satu. Wani kt UK. Blaja. Iza kt Melaka. Blaja gak. So tinggal la saya sorg kt rmh tu. Nasib baikla along bwk blk kucing nie. It's a blessing for me.

Amat nakal walaupun muke mcm xbersalah. Kalo tgk gmbr tu pn tau. Sbb xdpt manje so the best action is..."duduk atas beg laptop angah". It will attract my attention. Mmg btul! Mmg she attract me attention. Tp xpe. Sayang pnye pasal. Hehehe...

So the next 3 weeks I want to apologise to you. Angah terpakse menambah aktiviti dlm rutin sharian angah. So mybe you will feel lack of attention from me. But I want you to remember that I love you ye itam. Angah sayang itam. Sayang sgt2. Nnti angah ganti blk 3 minggu tu angah bwk itam jln2 naik kete. Kite pegi Bangi. Nk? Hahaha. Kite tangkap cicak same2. Ok sayang. I love you itam. Muahhh...

love quote

2009-01-12T14:51:00.001+08:00

They say loving you gives pains and full of sacrifices But I'll rather take pains and lots of sacrifices than not to be love by you.

dh tau tp buat2 xtau....????

2009-01-12T09:20:00.003+08:00

Dua hari yg lepas, hari minggula kan! So rasenye hari yg sempurnala untuk melepaskan tension. Nk melepaskan tension bkn dkt2 tmptnye. Adalah mkn dlm 30 minit nk ke destinasi. Lalu highway la tp. Bkn xnk lepaskan tension dkt tmpt dkt2. Tp tmpt dkt2 pack sgt org. Lagipun tmpt untuk org2 'high class'. Mcm saya ni, pasar mlm pn ok je. Janji cantik. Hehehe.

So smpai2 je kene tggu kejap. Sbb kwn dh janji nk 'brunch' (breakfast + lunch) dgn housemate dier. So xpela. Tggu la dlm 40 minit plus another 10 minutes sbb nk siap2 jap. Nk pkai kasut lg. Hehehe. Tp xpe. Tggu lame pn xpe sbb dier dh janji dgn housemate dier kan! Xbaik mungkir janji. Dosa.

So dh siap sume, bertolak ke tmpt yg nk dituju. So sepanjang perjalanan diam je. Radio pn xbukak. Tanye sepatah, jawab sepatah. Marah ke? Ermm bkn marah...tp lapar sgt2. Xlarat nk bercakap. So diam je la. Bile tnye dh breakfast. Cepat je mulut ni jwb dh. Ha padan muke. Sape suh tipu.

So dh smpai tmpt dituju tu mule2 skali nmpk McD. Hehehe. Yg magiknye trus blh senyum n trus blh bcakap. Cakap xberhenti plak tu. Mybe sbb dpt bau burger McD tu kot. Trus dpt energy. Hehehe. Bau je tp xmasuk. Sbb tgh boikot barangan keluaran Israel. Lps tu jln2 sekejap. Beli tiket wayang. Smpatla beli suratkhabar. Shopping kejap. Bru dpt makan.

Then, masa mkn tu byk bende saya dpt tau. Dr xtau trus jd tau. Pasal riba. Pasal future financial. Pasal mcmane kite nk elakkan riba kalo blh dikatakan sume institusi kewangan menggunakan riba. So scara langsung dan xlangsung kite terlibat. Riba tu haram. So slame kite hidup ni kalo kite scara langsung dan xlangsung berkait dgn riba maknenye...???Ishh tkutnye pikir. Pikir kalo Allah xberkatkan hidup kite. Tkutnye. Lps tu kwn saya bgtau. Itula gunenye zakat dan sedekah.

So pada saya, hujung mggu hrtu saya menyelam smbil minum air. Ataupun "Kill two birds with one stone". Dapat release tension dgn dptla timba ilmu skit. Sbb rasenye sume org tau tp blh jd diorg buat2 xtau...??? So pada saya, kawan saya sorg nie mmg xkedekut ilmu. Ape je bende dier tau dier akan kongsi. Saya pulak suke mendengar dan suke berpikir dr ape yg dier kongsi. Anyway, tq 4 da knowledge. Really appreciate it. Nnti blh kongsi lg :)

love quotes

2009-01-09T11:13:00.000+08:00

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you' re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have YOU... The one who turns to his friends and says, thats her...

Dear diary...

2009-01-09T10:14:00.000+08:00

Did you realised that you will mostly,deeply hurt when the one hurting you is your loved one?Because you're putting so much hope on them. You're hoping someday they will save you. They'll be your shoulder when you wanted to cry. They'll be your voice when you couldn't even speak. They'll give all their strength on you so that you won't fall. They'll be someone to leans on when there is so much burden you are holding.

Is it possible if we don't put so much hope on them? The question that keeps lingering in my mind. I still can't find the answer. Am i strong enough to stand all alone in this world without my loved one? Am i strong enough to keep my problems without sharing with someone? I don't think i can make it. I have to tell someone. To share all my problems.

But what if your loved one don't seem to care? Don't seems to share all problems with you. Won't let you leans on them. Won't be your voice when you couldn't speak. It will hurt you. And now it's hurting me. Because you didn't even care about me. You didn't even look into my eyes and ask "Are you okay? You can tell me if you wanted to." So now you know, how cruel you can be to me, who only needed you in these moments.

XOXOX,
me